Holding the Key. Breaking the Curse. Breaking the Cycle.

[Continued from The Beginning Of A Core WoundingBeing Rejected By My Mother At Birth”]

Everything is energy. Our thoughts and emotions contain energies. They are energies. Our bodies are a multi-faceted, multi-level, multi-dimensional energy system.

Energy carries a vibration. We are always broadcasting energy.

When we think happy thoughts, it affects our bodies energetically; it raises our vibrational frequency and uplifts us.

When we hold good thoughts about someone, the energy travels to the person. It uplifts them. It raises their vibrational frequency as well.

This, even without us knowing or intending. And also even without the other person knowing.

Similarly, when we think of unpleasant thoughts, especially regularly, we lower our vibrational frequency.

When we think ill of someone, that unkind thought travels to the individual. It lowers their vibrational frequency as well.

Again, even unknowingly or unintentionally.

That is why we need to be mindful of every thought that we have. Even if we keep them to ourselves, our thoughts not only affect us internally but also those to whom such thoughts are directed.

*****

Merriam-Webster defines “curse” as “1 : to call upon divine power to send harm or evil upon, 2 : swear sense, 3 : to bring unhappiness or evil upon, 4 : to say or think bad things about (someone or something).”

“Spell” — in the context of this series of posts — is defined as “a spoken word or form of words held to have magic power.”

*****

I know that my mother was very disappointed by my disappearance from her life. She was deeply hurt. Angered.

As I wrote earlier here, the medicine woman who I met in July 2015, revealed that my mother was casting a harmful spell on me!

I can never prove — or disprove — that with absolute certainty. [More on this in my next posts.]

But what I can say for sure is this — my mother had been holding unpleasant thoughts about me, especially in connection with my disappearance.

She may even have uttered words out of sheer anger and frustration, resulting in a “curse,” unknowingly. Or maybe even knowingly — given how wicked and cruel she could be, as I shared here.

I fully understand my mother’s ill feelings. However, I do not believe that her disappointment is because of her genuine love and concern for me.

It is the narcissist in her that’s protesting my decision of staying and keeping away from her and the family. Especially from her.

What about her image? What will people think about her? How can she “defend” herself and convince others that she is the victim?

How can she uphold her image of being a “loving” mother who sacrificed so much for the family, especially given my father’s womanizing ways and having been abandoned by him?

Why is she not able to keep her children close to her — as the model mother does?

With my heightened sensitivity to subtle energies, oh, I could feel the power struggle and clash in our energies — even at a distance. It was challenging. At times, exhausting!

*****

I have written a number of posts on this site about the Karpman Drama Triangle [or Drama Triangle]. It describes fittingly the interactions and energy dynamics in our family.

Developed by Dr. Stephen Karpman, it represents the dysfunctional energy dynamics that play out in unhealthy and manipulative relationships. It is also often found in abusive homes and families, especially those afflicted with addictions.

The three dysfunctional roles involved are: (1) victim [poor me, help me]; (2) persecutor [the bully, villain, superior one]; and (3) rescuer [over-responsible, controller].

All three get switched — which is how the cycle perpetuates. Until one stops playing either role and chooses to engage differently — in an empowered and healthy way. Thus, ending the drama and cycle.

*****

I didn’t want to be an enabler and participant in the toxic family drama any longer. I broke away from my mother and the family to break the unhealthy cycle of abuse and toxicity.

I took care of my brother when he suffered a ruptured aneurysm in the brain due to drug abuse. That was pivotal in my journey and in my breaking away from the family toxicity.

When my brother was recovering and regained full consciousness [he was in a coma for about two weeks], he started taking out his frustrations on me and abusing my kindness. He was back to his pre-aneurysm spoiled, quick to anger, and entitled self.

I didn’t want to put up any longer with any of the abuse in the family. I didn’t want to turn a blind eye or deaf ear anymore.

It was the beginning of the end of my rescuing and caretaking days. It was also the beginning of my distancing from the family.

That was in 2003/2004. I wrote about that here and here.

I distanced from my siblings initially. Eventually, from my mother in 2010.

*****

As with anything, we all hold different views and beliefs.

From what I’ve researched about the generational or ancestral curse and healing, this is what speaks of truth for me —

A “generational curse” involves negative spiritual, mental, physical patterns or problems from the family history that are repeated in one’s own life and generation after generation.

Some examples of these curses are victimhood; poverty, scarcity; disease and illness; premature death; miscarriages [natural or otherwise]; incest; divorce, breaking relationships, searching from relationship to relationship and never being totally happy; accidents and injuries; any type of abuse [mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, sexual]; addictions [sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling]; adultery; violence; abandonment; betrayal; lies; manipulation; loneliness.

Bible verses referring to a generational curse manifesting up to four generations include,

Even amongst Christians, though, there are conflicting views — and interpretations — of the above text.

I’m not a Bible expert. What just struck me with that Bible passage is how it is consistent with what the medicine woman said, which I shared on an earlier post,

“…an irate family relative had cast a curse on the family, hence, the family discord and constant fights. It was cast by a female relative in my mother’s lineage, four generations back from mine — my maternal great-grandmother.”

Was the medicine woman’s reading of my and our family’s energies accurate, or did the Exodus 20:5 Bible text influence her?

Whatever the case may be, this much I know and agree with —

That is what cycle breakers do. We disrupt the status quo. We rock the boat.

Christian teachings point out that “choosing Christ” is what breaks the generational curse.

I prefer a more inclusive and universal approach —

Choosing a different way of living and engaging is what breaks the generational curse and ancestral wounds.

Putting a stop to the abusive treatments that my brother was according me was the beginning of the breaking of the cycle. I stopped being an enabler.

THAT is how we break the cycle. THAT is how we break the curse.

That is what the medicine woman meant when she said that I hold the key in breaking the family curse.

By choosing to live differently. By moving in a different direction.

*****

In most, if not all situations, not many in the family agree or accept the decision to choose a different direction. Those left behind do as best they can — usually out of desperation, if not ignorance — to pull those who are choosing differently back to the abusive, familiar environment.

That’s what the ‘forces of evil and darkness’ want. To maintain the status quo. To perpetuate the abusive cycle. For the unhealthy pattern to be passed on to the next generations and permeate to the extended families — and eventually, the rest of society.

*****

The fruits of the cycle breakers’ work may not be appreciated during our lifetime. We may even be condemned and judged for breaking away and breaking the pattern. Oh, I sure have had my fair share of those!

I’m hoping future generations will benefit from the work that I’m doing. It isn’t so much only for me, my little Nadine, my sanity, and well-being.

It is also for themthe next generations. My nieces and nephews from whom I have also been estranged, quite sadly, as a result of my estrangement from my family of origin.

This is partly why I’m writing on this blog about my experiences and insights.

My research shows that what will help in breaking the generational curse and toxic family cycle is by having adequate knowledge about the family history. It helps put things in perspective and context.

I hope that later, even and especially when I’m no longer in the Earthly plane, my writings will help my nieces and nephews, grandnieces, and grandnephews be better informed about what took place in their ancestral lineage.

More importantly, I hope that they — and other families that may also be trapped in the same web of dysfunctionality, abuse, and toxicity — will be more mindful not to repeat any of the unhealthy behavioral patterns that may be manifesting in their generations.

For them to choose and live differently. To choose a different direction.

For them to be the cycle breakers of their generation.

To be continued – Healing Prayers for My Mother & the Family

💖🌟🙏🌟💖

Copyright © 2011-2020 Nadine Marie and Aligning With Truth

About NadineMarie (Aligning With Truth)

I find much joy & fulfillment in sharing my experiences & insights through writing & blogging. I created the site, ALIGNING WITH TRUTH as a virtual center for healing where I share my thoughts & reflections, as well as the tools & resources that are helping me as I move along the path of awakening & coming home to the Self. As I live in joy & align with Truth, I AM shining my Light which is how I contribute to the planetary & humanity ascension. Brightest & Magical Blessings!!! Om Shanti. Namaste...💗💖💜Nadine Marie💜💖💗
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5 Responses to Holding the Key. Breaking the Curse. Breaking the Cycle.

  1. Pingback: The Beginning Of A Core Wounding – Being Rejected By My Mother At Birth | Aligning With Truth

  2. Pingback: Healing Prayers For My Mother & Family. Searching For Me. Be Careful What You Pray For… | Aligning With Truth

  3. David says:

    I love how what you write really gets me thinking. I am thinking about my secret use of reiki and crystals. I saw in your bio that you are a reiki master so I know you would relate. I got attuned to reiki 1 by distance reiki in December 2019 and it has kicked off a journey of healing and deeper understanding and insight. I am religious (I find it easier to write this comment without revealing my religion here) and my family is religious in the same religion. I am keeping my use of reiki a secret from my family. My mom would probably not mind hearing this secret since she did not mind when I told her about my “non scientific” chi gong practice but my father and sister are “scientific” “western” and I am afraid of them concluding either that I am not stable in my mind/ delusional to be experiencing such powerful experiences with reiki (they would criticize me for believing in something which “clearly” is just placebo effect) or just serious damage our relationship by putting more of a disconnect between us. My father is the type that would treat the idea of channeling universal energy like the idea that the world is flat. Have you met this type of person before? The difference here between you and me is that my parents are loving responsible people who always treat me well but since you are talking here about breaking away from your family it just brings up in myself thoughts about my own current unresolved situation. I love reiki but it is sometimes unpleasant to have to keep secrets and to feel not understood. I have suffered from not feeling understood for a while since I am just not the same type of person as my father but reiki is in my mind something else. I do have my own ideas on what to do but just writing this feels good and I would love to hear your thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Your comment put a smile on my face.☺ Slowly, the reason for our connection — why you were led and drawn to my writing — is being revealed. But I don’t want to preempt anything or be too presumptuous. I’d rather let things unfold organically.

      I’m not surprised that your Reiki attunement opened the doorway for your healing journey. That’s wonderful! 🙏👏I understand and respect your preference to keep your religion a secret. It’s not necessary for you to divulge it, David — be it here or in private. No worries.

      Yes, I have encountered individuals like your family members who are not open to non-Western paradigms and approaches — to healing or life, in general. It comes with the territory, unfortunately. That’s what happens when we choose what goes against traditional and mainstream consciousness.

      I have been clear that I do not want to impose my beliefs and practices on others; I only share them with those who are open to hearing about it. How I wish it is the same the other way around. Reality is, it isn’t. Reality is there are those who are closed-minded and will fight tooth and nail for their beliefs. And that’s ok. I don’t need to engage with them — I just walk away. Easy to do that, of course, when it’s not family.

      I totally understand the feeling of not being understood, David, and the unpleasantness of keeping secrets — just to maintain status quo or a harmonious relationship. It’s a choice that you will have to make, David, and only you can decide for yourself — now or later, eventually. Are you willing and ok with continuing with your journey, while keeping it a secret from your family — if that’s the acceptable way for you to maintain a harmonious relationship with them? I’m not sure what your living arrangement is. If you’re not staying with your folks, I think that’s more doable. Less conflicts energetically.

      Whatever your living arrangement is, I don’t think it’s for your best interest that you sacrifice pursuing your truth, restrain yourself from living and speaking your truth — if only because your family thinks or believes otherwise. I think parents need to be reminded that their children are not their possessions [Kahlil Gibran wrote a beautiful poem about that] — and especially when their children become adults, the adult children must be treated as adults, no longer eight-year-olds. I see a glimmer of hope with your mother being more open. Will you be ok with just exploring with your mother and asking her to keep it between the two of you — even initially, at least, and see how it goes from there?

      You’re fortunate that your family has been loving to you. But I’m wondering now, given what you said about your predicament — if they are truly loving towards you, wouldn’t and shouldn’t they honor and respect your choices, even though they are not aligned with theirs? If they are loving and supportive towards you only when you are all in unison with your beliefs and choices, etc., doesn’t that make the love conditional and the support provisional? What about your individuation process?

      Cycle breakers and system busters are born into families with the very purpose and mission of breaking the cycle. Of breaking long-held beliefs that need to shift [especially those that are disempowering] and introduce and replace them with new, empowered ones. That is how we help usher in the new way of living, the shift in humanity’s consciousness [individual and collective]. But again, I personally do not want to impose on them/others [family and otherwise] or force down their throats. I mentioned in one of my posts that with all my attempts for the healing of my family and my desire for us to heal together — to no avail — I realized and was reminded that we can bring the horse near the water, but we cannot make it drink.

      Have you looked into ‘indigo children’ [or rainbow or star or crystal children] or ‘starseed family’? It’d be interesting to see if you resonate with any of those.

      Thank you for trusting me with your situation and issues, David. 🙏😇 I’m glad you feel safe expressing yourself on this site — the writing of which has, in fact, been healing — whether or not you realize or feel that. ☺

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: The Request For Binding Prayers For My Mother Before Her Passing | Aligning With Truth

🌛🙏💖🌟🌞Would love to hear your thoughts, experiences, and wisdom!!!🌞🌟💞🙏🌜

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