Thankfully, I was recharged at my year-end retreat before coming ‘back to reality.’
It became even so much clearer to me why my stay was extended.
The Universe was prepping me big time!!!
Upon my return, what welcomed me was one distressing episode after another!
I still haven’t quite fully recovered from one episode. Another is still ongoing even as I’m writing this. I suspect it will go on for an extended time, longer than I prefer.
The incidents involved a friend, family, and my living situation with all three unfolding within an hour of my arrival!!!
Three. Within. An. Hour.
(I still don’t subscribe to the belief, though, that ‘everything comes in three’s.’ Maybe some. But not all. 😉 )
These stressful incidents seemed to have pretty much wiped out the recharging that I did at my retreat. It was so exhausting at all levels!
I cannot imagine how I’d have responded and how so much more distraught I would have been had I not reconnected with Mother Nature. It definitely would have been so much worse!!!
Finding the Gifts
I sure was tormented by these incidents, but they gifted me with the opportunities to master my lessons on:
Discerning who I can truly consider to be a ‘friend,’ to whom do I give my full trust, and to immediately cut ties when they’ve taken advantage of and abused my kindness and generosity and not showing any signs of remorse,
- Extending compassion to those who are unable (refuse?) to respect and honor me, my choices, and my boundaries, and taking my healing and recovery from my family estrangement situation to a deeper level, and
- Asserting myself and my rights including demand for the eviction of the errant neighbor (a first for me and it was so empowering!) who had repeatedly failed to comply with the no-smoking policy. Anyone with allergic rhinitis and asthma abhors living next to a smoker, especially one who again and again violates the no-smoking policy! (This is a different neighbor, though, from the one who created a scene and caused quite a stir in our complex on Christmas Eve.) Couple this with the incompetence of the residential complex admin staff and laid-back bordering uncaring attitude and culture that the region is known for, one is sure to go through the roof!!!
For the nth time, this isn’t home.
On my ‘Not So Quiet Christmas Eve’ post, I wrote that “Long before this incident, I already decided that this place isn’t ‘home’ for me. I have started preparing for and researching on my next adventure and exploration.”
It wasn’t so much that the distressing living situation-related episode strengthened my decision that this isn’t home.
It was more a reminder, reiterating to me to not go back to a place, this place — both the residential complex and the city where it’s situated — knowing fully well that I’m not supported, nurtured, and nourished in it. Quite the opposite, in fact.
Not going back to a place that I already know isn’t the place for me is a lesson that I already learned not too long ago — only over a year ago, in fact, — in a most painful, tragic, and traumatic way! (Why can’t life lessons be learned the easier way, eh?!?!? 😉 Or is it just me?🌞)
Without anything definite at this point, where I’m currently residing will continue to be ‘home.’ Again, no rushed, knee-jerk decisions and reactions! Already learned that, too!
What is definite at this point — and what the Universe is making sure that I truly and fully get — is when I close my door on where I’m at, I must keep the door closed and locked! Double-locked and padlocked! No second-guessing. No reconsidering. No coming back. This, while keeping myself focused on the gifts that have arisen from the adversities — and being ever-grateful for them!
“Why not both?”
I was recently sharing with a good-natured neighbor — yeah, there’s a few of them here 😉 — my preference and love for the water. The Ocean over the Mountains.
His reply struck me. It stuck with me.
“Why not both?”
Indeed, eh? Why not both?
My year-end experience at the mountainside, this conversation with my neighbor, and my subsequent conversation with Lauren Scott of Baydreamer (lovely poetry!!!) on my New Year’s Eve post brought back to my awareness that my dream and ideal home setting has really been having the water/ocean in front of me and the mountains behind.
I would love to be able to swim on some days and hike on others.
The water, the Ocean being “a dynamic force, constantly in transition, reflecting the same in our lives,”¹ is so cleansing and purifying!
The mountains, on the other hand, offer a sense of tranquility like no other. They’re also very grounding and re-balancing. “The mountain reminds us of the spiritual attainment that is ours as we overcome our obstacles.”²
Thanks to my neighbor and to Lauren — Through them, Mother Nature just gave me a nudge to revisit and clarify my preferences as I take the next step in my process of creating my geographical island home on Earth and prepare for my next exploration. For me to make sure that I’m nurtured, nourished, and rejuvenated by both the Ocean and the Mountain!
What is your preferred home setting? Where do you thrive and feel most ‘at home?’ What landscape calls out to your Soul? Is it the City? Forest trees, Gardens, and Plants? Meadows and Valleys? The Mountains? Oceans, Seas, and Rivers?
¹,² Andrews, Ted. Animal-Speak: The Spiritual & Magical Powers of Creatures Great & Small (p. 63, 62).
🕉 🙏🕉 🙏🕉