To live in the New is to live in Joy.
Much has been written about that and shared on ‘spiritual’ sites.
Determining and defining what it is that brings us the most joy is, in my opinion, and from experience, not as challenging as expressing it and bringing it out into the world — especially when what we are expressing goes against society’s standards and expectations. When there aren’t that many of us who are making such ‘unpopular’ choices.
Our commitment to authenticity is put to the test. If we’re choosing to live in the New and co-create a New Earth, how committed and determined are we in ‘being real’ and becoming our Authentic Selves?
At some point, we will need to face and embrace all our fears and take that ‘leap of faith.’ We must dive in. We cannot just wet our feet in the shore or soak in shallow waters. Eventually, we need to take that plunge, the deepest plunge….even without knowing what’s down there.
Oh, it is so rewarding, empowering, and liberating — to later ‘come out’ as we face our fear of the unknown. As we face the fear of veering away from the majority and mainstream.
In all likelihood, though, it results in feeling isolated. Alone.
To be amongst the few, at times, often, gets ‘lonely.’ That, again, is from my experience.
But if being true to ourselves gives rise to that, to the feeling of isolation and loneliness, then so be it.
Perhaps, making peace with the fact that that comes with the territory will make the sense of isolation more tolerable.
Oh, I’m not saying it’s easy. Far from it. I wish I can say that I have finally made peace with it.
Not a few are the times when I vented and complained about it over the years on this site! And I continue to struggle with it. To this day.
Choosing the Path Less Travelled, after all, takes a lot of Courage, Strength, Determination, and Trust. Patience, too! Something I have yet to master. 😉
The Recurring Theme of Authenticity
In my previous post, I cited a few articles talking about the theme of authenticity. A recurring theme. I continue to be synchronistically led to similar materials.
One is Maria Chambers‘ post, “Coming Out” to which I commented that it is indeed about us coming out and being true to ourselves and what brings us the most joy!!! Of determining and defining for ourselves what it is which is most Joyful to us.
I was just starting to write this post when what showed up on my WordPress reader was Leigh Gatskill’s post, “Being a trailblazer” speaking of a similar theme. Really loooove those synchronicities! ❤ 🙂
October 1st — My Day of Freedom
October 1st would have been my deceased father’s 84th birthday. I wanted to post something about the occasion.
With no ‘inspiration’ coming, I ‘suddenly’ thought of cleaning up my emails in the meantime. (It’s probably my first time to do this, clean up my emails — ever! And I’m convinced my father’s spirit had a hand in it…)
I was led to a three-year-old email which came from a former colleague. The sender and I were in the IT industry from which I turned my back after 16 years. I was in that world until September 30, 2000. It was my world. My life. My career was what defined me.
As I was reading this former colleague’s email, I remembered that October 1st , the day when I ‘just happened’ to read her email, is when I had my first taste of freedom 17 years ago.
October 1st was my first day out of the corporate world. My first day to be ‘free of the bondage.’
To be true to myself.
To come home to who and what I really am.
To make my Journey of Authenticity my focus and priority.
There isn’t anyone in my life now who is from my former world. Actually, there isn’t anyone in my life now who is from my ‘former life.’ Aka pre-awakening/wake-up call.
Truth be told, when I come across something reminding me of that phase in my life, my fears would resurface. I’d wonder — worry, to a certain degree, admittedly — how it would be like if and when I encounter my former colleagues.
I’m sure to feel the discomfort. The disparity. I know they won’t be able to relate to me — or I to them. They wouldn’t be able to get me.
Not coincidentally — synchronistically again — Brenda Hoffman’s October 2nd post, “Your Fears are Evolving Also” struck a chord. It echoed some of my deepest fears which resurfaced from having read that email from my former colleague.
Brenda’s post led to another of the many heartwarming online conversations that she and I have had over the years — with such conversations, thankfully, making me feel less alone.
Interacting with former colleagues and acquaintances in the IT industry — or anyone from my previous life/world for that matter — isn’t something that I look forward to. It is something I’d rather not experience for all the reasons that Brenda shared in her post.
The Path of the Few
Her post reminded me of the courage that it took for me to turn my back on the corporate world after being so immersed in it for 16 years. This, without having any clue as to what would be next for me.
For a control freak, for someone who needed everything planned out and scheduled, that sure was a leap of faith!
More than the facing of the unknown, it was the bold act of committing myself and dedicating my life to self-healing. Of peeling away the layers — and of not giving up. Of being so determined to really get to the bottom of who, what am I really?
That process led to the deepening of the healing and inner work that I started in 1998 after my wake-up call. Of putting an end to all my former unhealthy and destructive habits and patterns and limiting and disempowering beliefs — including the false teachings and dogmas that have been instilled by the Catholic Church.
The majority of my fellow Filipinos are Catholics. The Philippines is “the only Christian nation in Asia. More than 86 percent of the population is Roman Catholic.”
So, I sure am a deviant here! I’m no longer shocked when I’m thought of as the ‘work of the devil’! 😉 I’m no longer hurt or affected by it. I’m amused at best. 😉
That process also meant ending — eventually — all my previous interactions and relationships — from work, school, friends, and family of origin. With the Philippines being a predominantly Catholic country, coupled with putting the family at the center of the Filipino value system, I’m definitely a square peg in a round hole! 🙂
But such is the Path of Authenticity. My path. The path I’ve chosen. The Path of the Few.
The path of facing the world and being and birthing to, not the ‘new’ me, but the ‘real me.’ The Authentic Me.
Yes, it means not being part of the majority. Feeling and being isolated. Feeling alone and lonely.
And my saving grace has been, thankfully, the Internet and our blogging community!!! ❤
🕉 🙏🕉 🙏🕉