The Need To Feel Connected

I’m feeling incredibly sad. Melancholic. Mournful. It is that feeling when something has come to an end.

There isn’t any particular relationship or experience in my life that has ended. None, at least, that I’m aware of.

So, what’s triggering this? Where is this gloomy feeling coming from? I can’t quite put a finger on it.

Does this have anything to do with the prevalent energies? The eclipse and the full moon?

Maybe.

The current eclipse, after all, is touted to be a most potent one — whatever that truly means. I haven’t really been digging much into ‘The Great [American] Eclipse’ — despite the ‘hype’ and with all due respect.

I don’t want to be influenced by what I read or hear about. I want my experience to be organic. I want to just flow with the energies.

And right now, I am enveloped by the energies of sadness.

I’ve also been discerning if what I’m experiencing is sadness or loneliness. Or both.

I think it’s both.

True Confessions of a Terrible Blogger

During these moments of melancholy, I immediately go to my WordPress reader and see what other bloggers are sharing.

Quite interestingly, I suddenly thought of one blogger, Janice of Grace Upside Down, from whom I haven’t heard in a long time.

I’m instantly led to one of her previous posts, True Confessions of a Terrible Blogger. Much of what she shared there echoes my sentiments. (No wonder, I was led to it!)

I had already ‘liked’ her post at the time that she published it. But it didn’t quite hit me then as much as it did now.

And it boils down to CONNECTION. The need to feel connected. Be it online or in person.

Janice wrote,

“I have no interest in trying to be “someone”, or garner an adoring crowd (well, actually, that part sounds pretty good.  haha!)

So why write here?  What is it that keeps me coming back (albeit sporadically), year after year, even after weeks and months of being MIA?

It’s simple, really. I long to connect.  To reach out and touch someone and maybe, if I’m lucky, have them touch back.  To write something and have someone say, “Hey, me, too!” or “I totally get you!”

Being “get” cannot be rated highly enough.”

Janice articulated for me what it is that moves me to come back to this site and share.

In my earlier years of blogging — and up until recently — it was largely my need for approval that I was unknowingly fulfilling. I’ve shared about that quite a bit on this site.

Thankfully, I’m much more aware and mindful now of that unhealthy pattern.

More than and rather than seeking to fill an unmet childhood need for approval or validation, I write and share because of the thrill that I get when I’m told that someone else is also going through a similar experience. Or they share my beliefs or perspective. Or what I wrote is exactly what they need to hear.

I’m thrilled when I’m told that we share the same thoughts, emotions, or sentiments. That they feel the same way. They feel me. They get me. And I, in turn, get them.

Hearing “Me, too!” is music to my ears. To anyone’s ears. It is nourishment for my soul and human self! It makes me, it makes us feel connected.

I get such a high when I’m able to touch someone’s life through my writing and sharing. And it is the same high that I get when they, in turn, touch mine.

And something as simple as a ‘like’ in my post gives me that feeling of connection. That joyful feeling of fulfillment. Seeing a notification of someone ‘liking’ my post makes a huge difference and impact to me. If you only know…..

Especially more so when I come across others’ posts that echo my state of being, wow!

And I’ve just been reminded how impactful a seemingly insignificant act of ‘liking’ a post can be to someone. That I mustn’t hold back or be stingy about it.

To be Seen, Heard, Acknowledged, Valued, and Honored.

The need to belong is a universal need. It is shared by all of humanity.

To be seen, heard, acknowledged, valued, and honored is as essential to our well-being as food, clothing, and shelter.

And it is this need, the longing, and desire for CONNECTION that is at the crux of this feeling of sadness and loneliness that I’m now experiencing.

And thanks to Janice, for being instrumental in leading me back to that truth. My truth. To acknowledge it and to speak it.

Indeed, “Being ‘get’ cannot be rated highly enough.”

🕉 🙏🕉 🙏🕉

Copyright © 2011-2017 Nadine Marie V. Niguidula, M.A. and Aligning With Truth

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About NadineMarie (Aligning With Truth)

I find much joy & fulfillment in sharing my experiences & insights through writing & blogging. I created the site, ALIGNING WITH TRUTH as a virtual center for healing where I share my thoughts & reflections, as well as the tools & resources that are helping me as I move along the path of awakening & coming home to the Self. As I live in joy & align with Truth, I AM shining my Light which is how I contribute to the planetary & humanity ascension. Blessed be. Namaste...💗💖💜Nadine Marie💜💖💗
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5 Responses to The Need To Feel Connected

  1. Leslie says:

    Thatʻs IT!
    I do get it!
    The tears roll right along with the word flow, nothing else seems to matter at all.

    Dearest Nadine Marie,
    Your posts are both salve for a wound and rainbows for the heart, whispers on the wind carried by white winged doves.
    When words fail me, the ʻnothingʻ sweeps in and as for quite some time now, either you hear me or I hear you – all at the same time!
    Connection
    Comprehension
    Completion

    Blessed be, I am honored to be blessed by your wisdom and your truth.

    Namaste

    Big HUGs to you,
    Leslie

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Encounters: Intimate Conversations On Belonging Beginning August 15 | Aligning With Truth

  3. Patrice Amadahy Phavato says:

    Dear NadineMarie, You know what? The day after the great “American” eclipse I fell into a deep deep despair of loneliness. Typically I will try to shove those feelings back down deep inside, but this time I just allowed them to be what they were and to cry for about a day and a half. I went back into my life, my childhood, and pulled up some memories that were about loneliness and so I was able to name it. I felt a lot better after for several weeks and then I was again triggered by seeing pictures of my adult daughters as little happy girls before the “Mack Truck of Life” hit us head on when their father passed in their adolescence. I wanted to shove those feelings down too because it hurt so much and I missed those little girls so much, but instead I sat with the pictures and I felt the pain and the loss and the loneliness of it all and allowed the healing tears. I live alone now and feel the loneliness of this as well, but one afternoon in my back yard a breeze went by my cheek and whispered in my ear, “Why can’t the loneliness be peace?” I think this just may be another life long lesson as well…finding peace with loneliness. So, all of this to say that I get you and the eclipse did bring up a big shadow for me front and center…loneliness. Patrice

    Liked by 1 person

    • It has been quite a challenging-transformative time for me, too, around the time of the Great Eclipse. I’m still processing and integrating my experiences. It is important and crucial that we acknowledge and honor our feelings. The more we deny what we feel, the deeper the underlying issue gets, and the more difficult it becomes and longer it takes for us to heal and transmute them. I believe it is because you allowed yourself to feel and practiced self-compassion that paved the way for you to hear the message, “Why can’t the loneliness be peace?” which I so love!!! Thank you for sharing your beautiful narrative.

      Much L ❤ ve, Big Hug, & the Brightest of Blessings to you, Patrice! Om Shanti. Namaste. 🕉 🙏🕉 🙏🕉

      Like

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