The refrain of the song, “Nothing Compares 2 U” keeps playing in my head as I transition from sleeping to waking state this morning.
What could the message be?
I google the song. I watch the “iconic” video of Sinead O’Connor, the voice behind the 1990 hit song.
But I don’t resonate with the message of the song whose lyrics “explore feelings of longing from an abandoned lover’s point of view.” I find them quite disempowering, in fact.
Could the message simply be the title of the song? That I’m being reminded that ‘nothing can compare to me?’ That I need to stand by and be in my uniqueness? My unique expression? That I mustn’t be comparing myself to others?
But I have written about that already not too long ago. What else am I not ‘getting?’ What else am I being told?
I google some more.
Miley claimed that Sinead’s “Nothing Compares 2 U” served as her inspiration in her “Wrecking Ball” video. Sinead gave her unsolicited advice and wrote an open letter to Miley intended “in the spirit of motherliness and with love.” The gesture earned Miley’s ire.
Boom! That’s it! That’s the message for me.
“Let people be, Nadine. Let them be on their journey — however way they want to live their lives and whatever choices or decisions they make. Just observe — with compassion — and think only loving thoughts. If you feel the need to ‘help,’ DON’T — unless you’re asked. Hold your tongue. Stop giving unsolicited advice. Stop coming to anyone’s rescue. No one needs any saving or rescuing — unless invited or requested.” (I’m not talking about emergency situations here. That’s not part of this conversation.)
That’s it! That’s the message of the ‘dream.’ That’s the reminder.
A couple of days before having this dream, another reminder with a similar message just caught my attention — synchronistically — Lee Harris’ Energy Update for April 2017.
I used to follow Lee’s updates quite regularly, but it’s been a long time since I looked it up. When it showed up in the video feed, though, the title caught my attention —
The End of ‘The Love and Light Brigade’ & The Rawness of Re-patterning
True enough, his message was a timely reminder. A reminder to stay on this path of holding my rein when the opportunity shows up and tempts me to jump in and ‘help’ (aka ‘save’ and ‘rescue’).
Surely, that message is loudly calling my attention! 😀
I’ve shared quite a bit on this site about my deeply ingrained rescuing tendency. The tendency is still there. Thankfully, though, I have, by now, addressed it to a greater extent.
Back in my rescuing days, I would immediately jump at the opportunity and do what I can — and give whatever, all of me, all I could — to relieve others of their suffering and pain.
I would forget myself. I’d neglect my needs along the way.
It was, after all, what I perceived back then as my personal mission. It was the way that I believed I could make a difference — to be selfless in the service of others. Yikes! 😮 😮 😮
I wouldn’t stop ‘helping.’ Not until I’d have accomplished what I had believed was the reason those ‘victims’ and I crossed paths. I was to ‘help’ them by making them feel better and relieved, solely through my presence and efforts.
It was, not surprisingly, at the expense and detriment of my well-being. Unfortunately.
Opportunities to Stop Being a Rescuer
In recent weeks, I’ve crossed paths with quite a few ‘victim souls’ who are so miserable and feel quite helpless. I don’t doubt or question the challenges that they’re going through.
But I don’t have any guilt feelings when I leave the conversation with the person still in their state of despair and confusion.
I’m not saying I’m happy to see them suffering. I’m just not compelled anymore to have to be the one to remove them from such a state. I do as best I can to control myself. To simply honor them where they’re at and the choices that they’re making.
When we encounter the poor me’s, the whiners and complainers, it is imperative that we set energetic boundaries. We must be mindful that they don’t steal our energies so that they will feel relieved.
Someday, these poor me’s will learn to practice self-reflection and self-inquiry.
They will eventually learn to take responsibility for their lives instead of blaming others.
Time will come when they will discover the purpose of their miserable situation and how they can grow from it.
They will determine what skills and traits they can develop as a result of their misfortune.
They will find the gifts in their misery as they cease whining and complaining.
They will get there eventually.
But it isn’t my job to take them there. It isn’t my job to carry them and bring them there — or carry their crosses for them.
It isn’t my job to discover their gifts for them. It isn’t my business to point their lesson to them or to tell them how to live their lives — no matter how seemingly clearly it appears to me. I could also be wrong, after all.
When I do any of these for them, ultimately, I’m not actually helping. I am, in fact, disempowering them. I’m depriving them of the opportunity to grow and learn on their own.
I need to be attentive about all these to keep myself from falling into the rescuer trap. And I’m grateful that my dream and Lee’s message served as my reminders. I’m equally grateful to be reminded as well of how far along I’ve come in overcoming my rescuing tendency. 😀
Honoring Each One’s Unique Expression
We are each unique. We all have our uniquely chosen paths. We all have our distinct ways through which we express the Divine in our Human form.
And that form may be something with which we may not necessarily agree. We may feel uncomfortable with it. We may even find it ‘questionable’ or ‘wrong’ — as how Sinead found Miley’s expression of her art.
But it is Miley’s unique expression. It is her choice. It is Miley’s path. It is her life.
We must respect each individual’s choice/s — no matter how they come across to us as ‘wrong,’ ‘unspiritual,’ ‘flawed,’ ‘inappropriate,’ ‘faulty,’ and other similar ‘belittling’ descriptions.
When you think about it, aren’t such descriptions merely reflecting our judgments of others’ behavior and our perceived superiority over them? Why can we not simply be ok with such choices? (I draw the line with ‘criminal acts,’ though.)
We are, after all, serving our Divine Purpose — each one of us, in whatever way we each choose.
As we go through these times of intense shifts and transitions, may we be vigilant about our self-care practices as reiterated by Lee. May we continue to veer away from the old 3D paradigm martyr consciousness of needing to ‘save’ others or coming to their rescue as our calling or Divine Purpose.
May we focus instead on our — and not anyone else’s — process of evolution, as we honor and celebrate each one’s unique and full expression of their Light and Divinity.
And may we do so with nothing but much Reverence and Compassion.
⭐ ❤ 😀 ❤ ⭐