No more excessive alcohol consumption and intoxication in my midst. No more exposure to second-hand smoke. No more loud music playing at the bar that, every so often, I’d hear from my cottage.
No more shouting, screaming, and yelling. No more boisterous laughter intended solely to seek attention. No more loud conversations or music being played past my bedtime of 10ish coming from the next-door cottages.
No more shrill voices of people waking me up even before sunrise as if announcing to the entire resort, “Hey! Wake up! We’re now awake. Why aren’t you?”
In other words, no more inconsiderate guests who have no concern for others, unmindful if their behavior is disturbing and annoying — those who are clueless on what respect means especially as it relates to shared space. (And respect, as it relates to self-worth, I find out later, is a major lesson for the entirety of the resort management and staff. More about that in future posts.)
I’m able to sleep soundly and peacefully, fully and completely.
I wake up to the chirping of the birds and the crowing of the rooster — nothing else. All throughout the day, it is their voices that serenade me.
No need for me to play music to uplift the energies in my midst. To be serenaded by the birds is enough to soothe my soul — weary or not.
I’m lulled to sleep by the gentle rushing of the waves upon the shore — no need to play meditation music to drown out the noise outside, to help me relax and fall asleep. I still play relaxing music and guided meditation but only with the sole purpose of helping me release the energies of the day so as not to take them to my sleep.
I’m able to spend my morning seated on the bench at the beach by my lonesome, having my morning tea, doing my breathing meditation, taking in and soaking in the purity of the energies of morning — no one disrupting my solitude, no one encroaching on my space.
I watch the setting of the sun and relish the sacredness of the moment, savoring the blessing being bestowed upon me — no music playing in the background at the bar that only disrupts the solemnity of the moment.
I’m able to more freely walk around the resort or head out to the beach — whenever I want to, without having to be overly concerned about being exposed to too much toxic energies from heavily intoxicated individuals, with their seemingly insatiable thirst for alcoholic drinks and cigarettes.
All these because it is now low season. There are very few guests. (There’s only me and one other guest as I’m writing this.) There’s less toxicity in the energies at the resort — much, much less. Yay! 😀
In other words, I’m now only starting to live my dream life — the life that I deserve but was deprived of me during my several months of stay here. Not all the time, though, but for the most part.
It was my choice, though.
I chose to stay — despite all the annoyances and irritants.
I chose to stay — despite that I was already getting sleep deprived and distressed by all the nuisances around me.
And it wasn’t only the heavy intoxication in the resort that I was putting up with. Excessive alcohol consumption is a lifestyle in Sugar Beach — particularly with the majority of the resort owners.
There’s also the absence of a community. Divisiveness prevails amongst the resort owners. To each his own. Crab mentality. (And I thought it was a Filipino cultural thing until a Swiss resort owner enlightened me that it is also a Swiss cultural thing.) The resort owners association hasn’t met for several years.
I chose to justify the energies that were so misaligned with mine with the fact that Sugar Beach isn’t as crowded as most of the other tourist destinations in the country anyway.
I chose to overlook all of the misaligned energies and convinced myself that the overall beauty of the beach is worth the compromise — ‘sacrifice’ is more like it. Sugar Beach, after all, is one of the ideal bodies of water to take a swim. It is truly a swimmer’s paradise!
Besides, the design of my little witch house comes closest to that of my ideal home. It is even situated at the farthest end of the resort. And with the large empty space that’s filled with tall, luscious trees right next to my cottage, I’m nestled at the ‘most quiet’ area of the property. I’m farthest from the restaurant-bar where the ‘action’ is taking place that would last often up to the wee hours in the morning! 😦
It is one reason I opted to stay — longer than necessary. It is partly why I attempted to make it work and even seriously considered the option of building my own little cottage. It would be at the empty space anyway. That would make me even farther away and isolated from all the toxicity.
I was blinded by the beauty of the place — both of the resort and Sugar Beach.
I dismissed the heaviness and toxicity in the energies emitted by the people as a result of their unhealthy lifestyle choices — the misqualified energies that were, sadly, diminishing the beauty of Sugar Beach and spoiling her pristineness.
I disregarded the dense energies that were dimming her brilliance — with not much success, though, thankfully.
But they were also the very same heavy and toxic energies that were, unbeknownst to me, dimming mine — enough to have turned me into a monster and pushed me to leave the resort on that fateful day of the 17th of May, only two days before my birthday.
“This isn’t how I want to celebrate my birthday. I want to be joyful, peaceful and well-rested on my special day,” I tearfully conveyed to the owner as I made arrangements for a boat transfer to get me out of Sugar Beach.
And I sure AM glad that I was able to get out — fast and easily!
The distance has greatly assisted me in coming back to my senses. Being away made me revisit my priorities, values, and principles.
And now that I’ve come back, I’m so thankful that the energies in the resort have shifted! It will greatly assist me to be in a state of Peace and Calm, Gratitude and Appreciation when I finally pack all of my stuff — which is a lot! 😆
More importantly, I AM grateful for my internal shifts. For the renewed focus. The clarity.
And most important of all, I AM most grateful for my strengthened connection to Source.
😀 ⭐ ❤ ⭐ 😀
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