Fearing What I Don’t Know

I don’t know what the exact medical terminology is for her psychological condition.

Panic disorder? Manic-depressive? Bipolar? Post-traumatic stress disorder?

I don’t know if anyone in her family truly knows — if anyone truly wants to know, cares enough to know, or even has the courage to know.

Ahhh…to be in denial. Almost always, an auto-response to such situations. We’ve been there, too — me and my family.

I don’t know this woman’s story; I don’t know her history. I don’t know what caused or triggered her mental and psychological issues.

Do I need to know? Why? Wouldn’t that be reverting to my old pattern of getting sucked into other people’s stories and drama? Wouldn’t that be pulling me back to my old 3D pattern of caretaking and rescuing?

I’m not making it my mission to get to the bottom of her story — just in order for me to extend understanding and compassion.

It did cross my mind though. I wanted to know what caused it. I wanted to know the details.

And it is because, admittedly, I am afraid. I’m afraid of what I don’t know. I’m afraid of what I might come to know. Fear of the unknown.

After all, without being properly informed of her true condition, without an accurate description, it’s so easy for me to fall into fear mode — to imagine, to speculate.

I think we’ve all heard stories of and witnessed those who have “lost it” and snapped at others — for seemingly no apparent reason. A la Jekyll and Hyde. I think we’ve also done that to others, at one point, or another. Maybe, we still do.

Acting out. Repressed emotions coming to the surface. Being overcome by one’s shadow. At times, the wounds are so severe that they cause irreparable damage on the psyche.

Might she be in the same situation? Is she capable of the same thing? How safe is it [for me] to be around her? How much harm or danger, if any, does she pose to other people?

And why is it a major concern to me?

Because it is connected to my process of manifesting my island home. It is a point to consider, a major consideration in choosing and deciding how to co-create my sanctuary here in Sugar Beach.

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Copyright © 2011-2014 Nadine Marie V. Niguidula, M.A. and Aligning With Truth

 

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About NadineMarie (Aligning With Truth)

I find much joy & fulfillment in sharing my experiences & insights through writing & blogging. I created the site, ALIGNING WITH TRUTH as a virtual center for healing, where I share my thoughts and reflections, as well as the tools & resources that are helping me as I move along the path of awakening & coming home to the Self. As I live in joy & align with Truth, I AM shining my light which is how I contribute to the planetary & humanity ascension. Blessed be. Namaste...♥♥♥Nadine Marie♥♥♥
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2 Responses to Fearing What I Don’t Know

  1. Pingback: The Gifts Behind the Fear | Aligning With Truth

  2. Pingback: What I NEED To Know, I Already DO Know | Aligning With Truth

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